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A married man says he became “obsessed” with another woman after meeting her at a course - but his wife has since forgiven him after realising it “wasn’t his fault”.<br/><br/>Ruth Perl, 58, and her husband David, 64, have spent 13 years recovering from the incident.<br/><br/>David never acted on his feelings towards the person he fancied - but he chose to tell the woman after confiding in Ruth.<br/><br/>He started researching an emotional experience known as ‘limerence’ - which means intrusive, romantic thoughts about another person. <br/><br/>David realised his feelings were unwanted - he had no control over them and wasn't interested in beginning an affair with the woman. <br/><br/>After telling Ruth about his realisation, the couple spent time rebuilding their relationship - and say they’re happier than ever.<br/><br/>David, a couples’ therapist from St. Albans, Herts., said: “It wasn’t a normal crush, it was weird and disturbing - but we’ve put in the years to heal ourselves since.<br/><br/>“It was a difficult one - I did end up telling the other person, as I was encouraged to do so through therapy.<br/><br/>“I think she was horrified - in hindsight, it was really unfair to put that on her.<br/><br/>“But it’s all about forgiveness, we’ve done the work and are happier than ever.”<br/><br/>David met the woman he developed feelings for on January 14, 2011 - after chatting to her at a training course.<br/><br/>Their conversation lasted less than 20 minutes, but David could feel he was “besotted” by her - without being able to put a finger on why.<br/><br/>“I’ve had crushes before,” he added. “We both have. But nothing like this - this was really unusual.”<br/><br/>David thought about her, night-and-day, for weeks.<br/><br/>He looked online at forums about “obsessive love” - and came across a post about limerence.<br/><br/>He said: “I thought, 'jeez, this is what I’ve got to a T.'<br/><br/>“Something’s not right - I was absolutely obsessed and I only spoke to her for 20 minutes.<br/><br/>“I kept going over every single word she said to me, every little action.<br/><br/>“The moment I’d wake up, I’d rehearse in my head what I might say to her if she came up to talk to me.<br/><br/>“I’d experience soaring highs if she replied to an email - and extreme lows if she didn’t.<br/><br/>“It was like an intermittent reward.”<br/><br/>Knowing the feeling wasn’t going to go away any time soon, he decided to tell Ruth - who also works as a couples’ therapist.<br/><br/>She said: “David told me, and this was all going on about five days after my dad’s funeral.<br/><br/>“I was in horrific grief at the time, and so my first thoughts were: ‘Oh, for god’s sake. How can you be so bloody stupid?’<br/><br/>“My dad had just died, and my husband wanted to p*ss off into fantasy land.<br/><br/>“We went into freefall, and it was a very, very difficult 12 months.”<br/><br/>After choosing to concentrate on grieving for her dad for a year, Ruth says she “finally had the brain capacity” to sit down with David, and ask him what was going on.<br/><br/>He hadn’t acted on his feelings - and actively decided he wouldn’t “consummate” the crush.<br/><br/>“David reached out to me,” Ruth said. “He asked me, ‘please help me understand what’s going on.’<br/><br/>“He was so confused. I asked him if he still wanted to be married, and he said, ‘I don’t want to throw away what we’ve got.’<br/><br/>“I told him to sit in the confusion, and I’d do what I could to support him.<br/><br/>“But I knew that what will be will be, we might not necessarily make it out of this.”<br/><br/>David said: “We started having marriage counselling - and one thing I want to stress is it isn’t an excuse to cheat.<br/><br/>“I was responsible for what I did - but it did make me realise that often, people don’t set out to have an affair.”<br/><br/>David explored some of the ways therapists encourage people to “heal” from limerence - including starving themselves from contact, or consummating it with the other person.<br/><br/>He settled on going to therapy, and letting the woman know he couldn’t speak to her anymore.<br/><br/>Now, David and Ruth help other couples going through the same thing - and have taught their children, Hannah-Mai, 32, and Isobel, 29, how to value their own relationships.<br/><br/>Ruth said: “It was important our two daughters knew about all this.<br/><br/>“They were older teenagers when this was all going on, and they understood it.<br/><br/>“We thought it was very important for them to understand that all marriages have differences - but you don’t throw the towel in when the going gets tough.<br/><br/>“Even when you’re talking about a full-blown physical affair. Once is a mistake, twice is a habit.”
⏲ 4:49 👁 305K
Pupils at a London special school were locked in “calming rooms”, beaten and left in their own urine, an investigation has found.Staff were filmed hitting and kicking pupils at Whitefield School in Walthamstow, which is one of the UK’s largest special schools with about 370 pupils.
⏲ 1:0 👁 450K
Just as you prepare for life’s significant events, it's equally crucial to anticipate your eventual departure and protect your loved ones from the burden of financial complications. Forbes contributor True Tamplin outlines how to tackle your assets.<br/><br/>Read the full story on Forbes: https://www.forbes.com/sites/truetamplin/2023/10/31/4-questions-to-know-if-you-are-financially-prepared-to-die/?sh=4275a1864730<br/><br/>Subscribe to FORBES: https://www.youtube.com/user/Forbes?sub_confirmation=1<br/><br/>Fuel your success with Forbes. Gain unlimited access to premium journalism, including breaking news, groundbreaking in-depth reported stories, daily digests and more. Plus, members get a front-row seat at members-only events with leading thinkers and doers, access to premium video that can help you get ahead, an ad-light experience, early access to select products including NFT drops and more:<br/><br/>https://account.forbes.com/membership/?utm_source=youtube&utm_medium=display&utm_campaign=growth_non-sub_paid_subscribe_ytdescript<br/><br/>Stay Connected<br/>Forbes newsletters: https://newsletters.editorial.forbes.com<br/>Forbes on Facebook: http://fb.com/forbes<br/>Forbes Video on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/forbes<br/>Forbes Video on Instagram: http://instagram.com/forbes<br/>More From Forbes:http://forbes.com<br/><br/>Forbes covers the intersection of entrepreneurship, wealth, technology, business and lifestyle with a focus on people and success.
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If you're planning on buying a home, you could face a higher than expected bill.That's because a judge approved a settlement with the National Association of Realtors. With approval of the $148 million dollar anti-trust agreement, home sellers' agents will no longer be required to offer a 5% or 6% commission to homebuyers' agents. The changes are set to take place in July of this year.
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Mira shares an idyllic life with her boyfriend, John. However, tragedy strikes when John dies, leaving Mira shattered. Years later, she returns to New York City; her past still haunts her, but she is determined to rediscover love.
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The IRS issued Revenue Ruling 2023-2, which had a substantial impact on estate planning, particularly where an irrevocable trust is involved. In the last decade or so, more families have begun utilizing irrevocable trusts to protect their assets from spend-down in order to qualify for government benefits, such as Medicaid and VA Aid and Attendance.<br/><br/>Prior to the issuance of this ruling, it was unclear whether assets passing to beneficiaries through an irrevocable trust would receive a step-up in basis, thereby eliminating any capital gains taxes that would otherwise be owed. Historically, assets that are disposed of during an individual’s lifetime are subject to capital gains taxes on the increase in value of that asset over time. The amount of capital gains owed is determined largely by the difference between the value at the time of purchase and the value at the time of transfer.
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Self-storage center real estate investment trusts (REITs) are companies that specialize in owning and operating income-generating storage facilities, commonly known as self-storage centers. Self-store center REITs invest in properties where individuals and businesses can rent space to store their belongings, such as furniture, household items, business inventory, and vehicles of all types.<br/><br/>Investors in self-storage center REITs benefit from the income generated through leasing storage units to tenants. The demand for self-storage has been driven by various factors, including residential moves, downsizing, and businesses seeking additional space.<br/><br/>If you're interested in investing in a self-storage REIT, here are two you could buy today.
⏲ 1:35 👁 2.6M
Ready to dive into the world of natural mysteries that'll give you goosebumps? We're talking about everything from the secrets lurking in Antarctica's icy depths to those mysterious holes that seem to pop up out of nowhere. Trust me, these are the kind of enigmas that'll have you scratching your head and sleeping with one eye open. So grab your snacks, settle in, and join us as we unravel the secrets of the Earth that'll leave you on the edge of your seat! Don't say we didn't warn you – these mysteries might just haunt your dreams!Animation is created by Bright Side.<br/>----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------<br/>Music from TheSoul Sound: https://thesoul-sound.com/<br/> <br/>Check our Bright Side podcast on Spotify and leave a positive review! https://open.spotify.com/show/0hUkPxD34jRLrMrJux4VxV<br/> <br/>Subscribe to Bright Side: https://goo.gl/rQTJZz<br/>----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------<br/>Our Social Media:<br/>Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/brightside<br/>Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/brightside.official<br/>TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@brightside.official?lang=en<br/> <br/>Stock materials (photos, footages and other):<br/>https://www.depositphotos.com<br/>https://www.shutterstock.com<br/>https://www.eastnews.ru<br/>----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------<br/> For more videos and articles visit:<br/>http://www.brightside.me<br/> ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------<br/>This video is made for entertainment purposes. We do not make any warranties about the completeness, safety and reliability. Any action you take upon the information in this video is strictly at your own risk, and we will not be liable for any damages or losses. It is the viewer's responsibility to use judgement, care and precaution if you plan to replicate.
⏲ 17:33 👁 295K
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