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A married man says he became “obsessed” with another woman after meeting her at a course - but his wife has since forgiven him after realising it “wasn’t his fault”.<br/><br/>Ruth Perl, 58, and her husband David, 64, have spent 13 years recovering from the incident.<br/><br/>David never acted on his feelings towards the person he fancied - but he chose to tell the woman after confiding in Ruth.<br/><br/>He started researching an emotional experience known as ‘limerence’ - which means intrusive, romantic thoughts about another person. <br/><br/>David realised his feelings were unwanted - he had no control over them and wasn't interested in beginning an affair with the woman. <br/><br/>After telling Ruth about his realisation, the couple spent time rebuilding their relationship - and say they’re happier than ever.<br/><br/>David, a couples’ therapist from St. Albans, Herts., said: “It wasn’t a normal crush, it was weird and disturbing - but we’ve put in the years to heal ourselves since.<br/><br/>“It was a difficult one - I did end up telling the other person, as I was encouraged to do so through therapy.<br/><br/>“I think she was horrified - in hindsight, it was really unfair to put that on her.<br/><br/>“But it’s all about forgiveness, we’ve done the work and are happier than ever.”<br/><br/>David met the woman he developed feelings for on January 14, 2011 - after chatting to her at a training course.<br/><br/>Their conversation lasted less than 20 minutes, but David could feel he was “besotted” by her - without being able to put a finger on why.<br/><br/>“I’ve had crushes before,” he added. “We both have. But nothing like this - this was really unusual.”<br/><br/>David thought about her, night-and-day, for weeks.<br/><br/>He looked online at forums about “obsessive love” - and came across a post about limerence.<br/><br/>He said: “I thought, 'jeez, this is what I’ve got to a T.'<br/><br/>“Something’s not right - I was absolutely obsessed and I only spoke to her for 20 minutes.<br/><br/>“I kept going over every single word she said to me, every little action.<br/><br/>“The moment I’d wake up, I’d rehearse in my head what I might say to her if she came up to talk to me.<br/><br/>“I’d experience soaring highs if she replied to an email - and extreme lows if she didn’t.<br/><br/>“It was like an intermittent reward.”<br/><br/>Knowing the feeling wasn’t going to go away any time soon, he decided to tell Ruth - who also works as a couples’ therapist.<br/><br/>She said: “David told me, and this was all going on about five days after my dad’s funeral.<br/><br/>“I was in horrific grief at the time, and so my first thoughts were: ‘Oh, for god’s sake. How can you be so bloody stupid?’<br/><br/>“My dad had just died, and my husband wanted to p*ss off into fantasy land.<br/><br/>“We went into freefall, and it was a very, very difficult 12 months.”<br/><br/>After choosing to concentrate on grieving for her dad for a year, Ruth says she “finally had the brain capacity” to sit down with David, and ask him what was going on.<br/><br/>He hadn’t acted on his feelings - and actively decided he wouldn’t “consummate” the crush.<br/><br/>“David reached out to me,” Ruth said. “He asked me, ‘please help me understand what’s going on.’<br/><br/>“He was so confused. I asked him if he still wanted to be married, and he said, ‘I don’t want to throw away what we’ve got.’<br/><br/>“I told him to sit in the confusion, and I’d do what I could to support him.<br/><br/>“But I knew that what will be will be, we might not necessarily make it out of this.”<br/><br/>David said: “We started having marriage counselling - and one thing I want to stress is it isn’t an excuse to cheat.<br/><br/>“I was responsible for what I did - but it did make me realise that often, people don’t set out to have an affair.”<br/><br/>David explored some of the ways therapists encourage people to “heal” from limerence - including starving themselves from contact, or consummating it with the other person.<br/><br/>He settled on going to therapy, and letting the woman know he couldn’t speak to her anymore.<br/><br/>Now, David and Ruth help other couples going through the same thing - and have taught their children, Hannah-Mai, 32, and Isobel, 29, how to value their own relationships.<br/><br/>Ruth said: “It was important our two daughters knew about all this.<br/><br/>“They were older teenagers when this was all going on, and they understood it.<br/><br/>“We thought it was very important for them to understand that all marriages have differences - but you don’t throw the towel in when the going gets tough.<br/><br/>“Even when you’re talking about a full-blown physical affair. Once is a mistake, twice is a habit.”

⏲ 4:49 👁 67.3M

Jubilee

Did Slavery Affect Your Family? Africans vs African Americans | Middle Ground

⏲ 24 minutes 39 seconds 👁 1.6M

A Nigerian Perspective With Frank Stephen

Nigerian REVEAL The SAFEST COUNTRY For A Black Woman

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<p>A Rochester woman had to undergo surgery and has been left with a broken nose after an unprovoked attack </a>while on a night out. </p><p>The 42-year-old has lost her sense of smell and taste following the assault - a man who has a history of violence against women has faced court. </p><p>Also in today’s podcast, worried business owners in Medway have been left fearing for their future after seeing customer numbers plummet</a> following a hike in car parking fees.</p><p>They claim footfall has dropped by around a third since the authority decided to increase its pay and display costs for on and off-street parking by 60p earlier this year. </p><p>The parents of a “kind and compassionate” man who died following a severe asthma attack</a> are raising awareness of the condition.</p><p>Dad-of-two Gary Bush was putting his young children to bed when he suffered the attack – this World Asthma Day his parents are urging people with the condition to find support. </p><p>One of the last remaining businesses in a closure-hit shopping centre extension says turning the site into 200 homes</a> could be a good opportunity.</p><p>It comes as the owners of Ashford’s County Square admit the development is “failing” and could be put to better use. </p><p>And you can hear from wildlife bosses as a significantly important area of marshland in Kent has been officially handed over to the Kent Wildlife Trust.</a></p><p>The site near Faversham has been described as a “service station for birds” and is home to more than 250 species. </p>

Podcast: Woman knocked out and left with horrific injuries in random pub attack

⏲ 24:25 👁 5.8M

African Diaspora News Channel

Woman Says Latin Americans Do Not Like Black Travelers Or Black Natives Because Of Their Skin Color

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Africa Reloaded

10 African Countries With The Most Curvy Women In 2022.

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10 Biggest WWE Main Roster Flops Before NXT | partsFUNknown<br/>NXT call ups aren't what they used to be, but call ups weren't great before NXT either! This is our list of the biggest main roster flops from before the time of the black and yellow but make sure you let us know your most heartbreaking call up in the comments below!<br/><br/>00:00 - Start<br/>01:09 - 10<br/>01:59 - 9<br/>03:02 - 8<br/>04:00 - 7<br/>05:01 - 6<br/>05:55 - 5<br/>06:58 - 4<br/>07:57 - 3<br/>09:01 - 2<br/>10:13 - 1<br/><br/>SUBSCRIBE TO partsFUNknown: https://bit.ly/2J2Hl6q<br/>TWITTER: https://twitter.com/partsfunknown<br/>FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/partsfunknown/<br/>Buy wrestling merchandise here: https://www.wrestleshop.com/<br/>Read more Feature content here on WrestleTalk.com: https://wrestletalk.com/features/

10 Biggest WWE Main Roster Flops Before NXT | partsFUNknown

⏲ 12:2 👁 12M

ohAFRO

10 Rarest Black People Who are 1 in a Million

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African Diaspora News Channel

Black American Women Are Mysteriously Losing Their Lives In The Gambia

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A new USA Today/Suffolk University poll shows Biden and Trump tied at 37% support each among registered voters. Nearly a quarter of voters say they could still change their minds, while 12% are undecided and 8% support independent Robert F. Kennedy Jr. Biden has gained some ground with Black voters, Hispanic voters, and those under 35, while Trump has lost support in those groups. Issues like abortion access, the economy, and Trump's trial are shaping the views of some undecided voters.

Biden and Trump Tied at 37% in New Poll. Abortion, Economy, and Trial Are Key Issues Influencing Undecided Voters.

⏲ 0:33 👁 13M

Adrian Harris

BEAUTIFUL BLACK AFRICAN WOMEN 2021

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AfroArtista Films

The Beautiful WHITE'BLACK' Africans.

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